When a client, friend, or former colleague tells me that they want more flexibility in their work life, I typically ask, Why? It’s not because I don't believe them, but I have come to observe that one's desire for additional flexibility is most often a drive towards greater autonomy and control in their lives.
Why might you, as a working adult, seek flexibility? Some of the common drivers include:
Caretaking: Your duties related to caring for child(ren), aging parents, or other loved ones require some reshaping of a traditional schedule. This is often associated with a life stage; the need for flexibility continues over a multi-year period yet shifting in size and shape.
Pursuit of a Passion: Your deep commitment to a hobby or special interest becomes the activity around which you structure your employment.
Greater Balance: You’re juggling a full life of competing priorities (of which caretaking and passions may be part) and seeking time block(s) during the work week to attend to non-work priorities.
Location: Your physical location makes full-time, in-person work inefficient or even impossible.
I would be lying if I said I could offer a one-size-fits-all solution to the flexibility conundrum. Understanding the driver behind your desire for flexibility is critical to 1) identify what autonomy looks like for you, both your ideal and that which you are willing to accept; and 2) determine your optimal role, employer, or culture. The truth is that perfect solutions rarely exist; however, the ability to articulate the driving need, the ask, and the terms of a workable solution will help you find a path towards a viable and meaningful career.
Sometimes, I find that sharing examples of creative workarounds that others have designed empowers flexibility seekers in their personal quest for greater autonomy.
Start a business: OK, Covid took hybrid and remote work off the list of taboo topics. Even as more employers mandate some form of a return to office (RTO), the idea of working from any location has become an acceptable topic of conversation and point of negotiation in accepting a new job.
Before Covid, one person shared that she left the tech industry in the Bay Area to start an entrepreneurial venture in real estate investment. While her new career offered no fewer hours or stress, it allowed her to work from anywhere in order to be present in small windows for her young children and a sick parent. As a single mom, she said, "My bag has literally been my office. I open my laptop when waiting for the school pickup and review spreadsheets in the parking lot. I'm a mobile office. For me, it's being able to create that flexibility."
Choose a stable paycheck that allows for the prioritization of other activities: One person talked about staying in a Fortune 500 company job that bores him because the stable paycheck allows him to pay care costs for his partner. Because of his long tenure, his employer allows for some flexible hours in his work week.
Another woman I met talked about an intentional compromise: staying in her current role versus vying for a promotion. A more senior role might bring additional work that spills into the evenings, when she practices and performs with a band. On the flipside, if she fully devoted herself to singing, then she might not be able to support herself in a way that she has chosen.
Create schedule flexibility: Some employment scenarios make this easier than others. A lawyer left firm life for the public sector and traded income for availability to her family. This second career allows her to make up hours in the evening or on weekends. She takes one night each week to work, in exchange for attending her kids' after-school sporting events.
Try different solutions and learning from them: A consultant opted to go to an 80% schedule after her third child was born. Yet she still found herself checking email and taking a meeting or two on Fridays and doing work in other windows throughout the week on her own terms. After a few years, her boss held a mirror up to her and shared his observation: few people work as hard on Fridays as they do other days of the week. So this consultant was making an expensive sacrifice for what came down to a difference of a few hours on a Friday. She went back to a 100% employment agreement with the understanding that she may take a few hours of anonymous time on a Friday and always completes any remaining work over the weekend. She notes that the periodic stressful Friday is a small price to pay for full compensation.
Hidden Gems
No, unfortunately, there is no silver bullet. Flexibility differs by industry, company, and role. Individuals range in their skills, aptitudes, and entrepreneurial appetite. The number of permutations is vast.
Flexibility and autonomy are functions of a personal value system. Understanding why you might seek additional flexibility is the key to knowing what to ask. I push people to figure this out by continually asking two alternating questions: Why? and What could you live with?
Gaining clarity around the costs of greater autonomy, or becoming aware of any sacrifice you're making in return, will prompt you to ask yourself:
Do the benefits outweigh the costs?
Does the newly created autonomy lead to sufficient improvements in your mental and emotional well-being?
If you can answer both of these questions affirmatively, then you may have created a win-win situation.
Do you have an example of a move you made to gain greater flexibility or autonomy? I’d love to hear it. Please share in the comments or email me at rachel@rachel-wexler.com.
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